Beijing - Day 1

We woke up somewhere between 1-2 am - jet lag is a beast.  

We ate at a wonderful, diverse breakfast buffet in our hotel.

We joined our group on a tour of a hutong (a traditional quadrangle home in Beijing) and rode in rickshaws.  

 We were able to visit a family and view their home, which was 160 years old. 

It was interesting to walk through their streets and learn more about their culture.  

 What impressed me most about this part of the tour is how much significance/meaning the Chinese place on things we wouldn't think about. 

  

 For instance, how many beams are above the doorway and how many steps are leading up to that doorway.  

These numbers would tell you about status of the family living inside.

  

 Also it would be bad luck for both of these numbers to be even or odd, there must be one of each.  

The kids are so confused as to what time it is; actually, we all are!

The man who owned this home trains and races pigeons.

He is also an artist.

An interesting car - handlebars instead of a steering wheel.

 From there, we went to learn about how silk is made.  

It was interesting to see and feel the silk in different stages.

The kids were excited to pick out some Chinese clothing.  

The girls chose dresses and Andrew chose a two-piece outfit.  

When I started to pick one for Elijah, he was quick to ask me to get the same one so that they can match. =)

After our tour, we went out for lunch.  Now we can really say we've had Chinese food.  

It was delicious, but certainly very different than what we've had in the US.

Some favorites were the egg drop soup, spicy green beans and a few things that I have no idea on their names - haha.

  From lunch we walked to Tian'an Men Square & the Forbidden City.

  Right about this time a couple of things happened: first, I realized what it must feel like to have paparazzi follow you around and second, it began to hit me that we are really, truly in China - seriously crazy.  

And apparently the Chinese people think it's crazy as well, at least based on the number of people taking our pictures. 

We were told that we would draw attention and that people would want to take our picture; however, even our guide was caught off guard by the amount of attention we received. 

 I'm guessing that the combination of blond hair, number of children and our double stroller (I don't think there are many of those here) formed the response we received today.  

People stopped us, followed us, and took our pictures so much that at one point someone in our group took a picture of all of the people taking pictures of our family. 

It was really something else.  

To stand in these historical places that I'd seen pictures of as a child was amazing. 

The beauty and magnitude of the Forbidden City is unparalleled. 

 It seemed to just keep going and going. 

There are so many rooms in the emperor's palace that if you stayed in a different room every night from the night you were born, you'd be 27 years old before you'd stayed in every room.  

Um, yeah, that's pretty huge.

Seeing this place, standing in it, I just kept thinking, "This cannot be real." 

It is also so fun to experience this with other families waiting to bring precious children home.

What a blessing it is to be here and experience this beautiful country and culture.

So here we are back in our room.  I'm not so sure anything I've written has made much sense.  I'm tired, more tired than I've ever been in my life.  My poor kiddos are super tired as well.  They're falling asleep at strange times & I'm hoping that they will adjust quickly.  But we are really so glad to be here.  It's been an amazing day, but tomorrow.....tomorrow, I get to see him.  It's not Gotcha Day, but we will get to visit his foster home and meet him.  This is a special gift & privilege.  We are so excited for the opportunity.

And we're off!

Our flight to Chicago was scheduled to leave Dayton at 8:50am on 10/31. 

 The kids wore their new shirts that say, "I can't wait to meet my new little brother!" 

  

After some concerns with the safety of the plane (oxygen issues...not super comforting) which delayed takeoff, we were finally on our way.  

 We left Chicago at 12:50pm on 10/31 and arrived in Beijing at 3:20pm on 11/1. 

The kids won over the flight attendants, who snuck them into the back of the plane and made them ice cream sundaes complete with whipped cream & a cherry.  

Wow....that was a long flight....with 5 kids.....I thought I was going to lose my mind and seriously considered pulling the emergency exit door am really thankful we arrived safely in China.  

 I've never seen an airport as large as Beijing's.  We taxied so long, I thought that the plane was just going to drop us off at our hotel. ;)  

 We got our luggage, Lily had her first experience with a squatty potty (I'm making it my personal goal to avoid them during our entire trip, think I can do it?) and we met some other families in our travel group along with our two guides, Michael & George.  

We had to wait awhile for everyone and traffic was really bad, so we didn't get to our hotel until around 7:30pm.  

I think we figured that the whole trip was around 25 hours. 

 We fell into our very small & very hard  beds (they like their beds to be extremely firm here) with smiles on our faces and excitement in our hearts.

What Elijah Doesn't Know...

• That we are coming to get him SOON! - As we scramble around preparing to take 9 people to China, he has no idea that we are coming.  In fact, he has no idea who we are at all.  The package that we sent him (which included pictures of us) never arrived, so he's never seen our faces.  It seems so strange to think that one day he will wake up, leave the only home he remembers and be handed over to strangers who look and talk differently.  As excited as we are for him to join our family, it breaks my heart to think of the fear he will likely experience.

• What a family is - Our precious boy has been so blessed to be in a wonderful foster home with approximately 15 other children; however, he has no idea what it's like to have a mommy and daddy.  Often children who have been in institutions happily go to lots of people and are content to be fed, changed and snuggled by just about anyone.  To an outside observer, it may appear that these children are flexible, easy-going or well-adjusted; however, these are actually signs of a deeper problem: attachment issues.  "Attachment is a close, trusting tie between two people; or in particular, as the reciprocal relationship between an infant and his/her primary caregiver as consistently providing emotional essentials such as touch, movement, eye contact and smiles, as well as the basic necessities such as food and shelter" (Adoption Parenting).  Typically, this occurs naturally between biological children and their parents, but adopted children may have had experiences or losses that can interfere with this important process.  Elijah, like most orphans, comes from a hard place.  In his short life he has been abandoned by his parents and lived in two orphanages.  It will be our job to teach him that we can be trusted, we are "his people", and that we will never abandon him.  Part of our teaching him this will mean that Sven and I will be the only ones holding him, dressing/changing him, and feeding him for awhile.  Though we are so excited for our friends and family to meet him, we ask that you understand this and support us in it. 

• How very loved he is by people who have never met him - How is it possible to love someone so much that you don't know?!  I don't know the answer to that question, but I know we do love him so very much.  Through months of praying specifically for him, hearing our children pray for him and talk about him, staring at his pictures and watching videos of him laughing, he has become our son.  Someone is missing and we cannot wait to bring him home.  Though the process has been difficult, it has been beautiful.  Much of that beauty has taken form in observing this same love develop for him in the hearts of our friends and family.  I type through tears as I think of the texts and calls saying you are praying for us or asking if there is any news, thoughtful gifts given to him and us that are representations of your love for him, offers to help as we worked on paperwork/errands or as we prepare to travel have touched us in ways we cannot adequately express.  I cannot wait to not only tell him how much we love him, but that he has so many people waiting at home to tell him the same thing.  Speaking of which....

• He's in for a seriously long trip home, 18 1/2 hours to be exact ;) - We have been asked about visitors at the airport.  We certainly welcome friends/family to come and meet Elijah when we return.  Obviously, we may be tired and a little disheveled looking, but I'm sure familiar faces will be a welcomed sight.  If you're interested in coming, just message me for details.  Our friend, Jeni Deason, has offered to be the point of contact for these details while we are gone.  

• There is a God who loves him very much.  Though much of his little life has been hard, God has never left him.  He has orchestrated details that have left us speechless and we cannot wait to tell Elijah all of the wonderful things that God has done as part of his story.

Such a precious gift!!

love like HE loves: Laughing...

I first heard about this video over a month ago and couldn't wait to see our boy in action.  Today was the day.  As I sat filling out our visa applications, I received the email from sweet Christine that she had posted it.  What a blessing!  Love him so much already!!

The Starfish

I met my friend, Heather, for coffee at The Greene at the end of May.  As we were leaving, we ran into one of her husband's cousins.  Heather introduced us and quickly told me that she had just spent a couple of weeks working in an orphanage in Haiti.  

She went on to tell us how it completely changed her life, how she wished she could take her family and go work in the orphanage forever, how everything here seemed suddenly pointless after staring that type of need in the face.  She said that after her group left, the orphanage had received twenty new children.  

She was heartbroken for those children.  She spoke of being overwhelmed by the need there. 

 I understood that feeling so very well. 

 It is one thing to know that there are approximately 147 million orphans in the world. 

 It is an entirely different thing to look some of those children in the face, feed them, love on them and know that there are millions and millions more of them. 

 Each having a story; each having a soul. 

 Overwhelmed doesn't begin to describe how one feels when seeing that sort of need. 

 I said to her, "It reminds me of the starfish story."  

She looked at me completely confused. ;) 

 Have you heard it?  It's one of my favorites!

We must not lose sight of the fact that behind those overwhelming numbers, are individual children. 

 It is heart wrenching to know that as individuals we cannot provide a home for each one; 

however, I don't want to be paralyzed by that, either. 

Fast forward a week.  We were at the beach to celebrate my in-laws anniversary.  We were waiting to be matched with our son.  I'm not going to lie, it kind of consumed me.  Knowing that he was out there somewhere and that we could receive a call at any moment seemed to be at the forefront of my mind all of the time.  As I was running on the beach (I know, me running?!, that's an entirely different story...) 

ANYWAY

as I was running, I was praying.  Praying to get that phone call soon, praying for that little boy whose face we had never seen, praying for the other children who needed homes, praying that somehow and in some way God's loud voice would boom through the clouds and let me know that He heard me, that He cared.  Well, as is usually the case, that loud voice never came.  However, after the run, I slipped off my shoes and socks, bent over to pick them up and saw it.  Right next to my shoe, in a small puddle of water was this:

Such a sweet reminder that each one of us matters to the One who matters most.

He hears us and loves us and is never overwhelmed by our great need. 

I immediately texted this picture to Heather. 

Fast forward a couple of months...some very thoughtful friends threw a 1st birthday party for our little guy.  I was so touched by the gesture and excited to someday tell Elijah that though we weren't there to celebrate with him, people who already loved him wouldn't let the day pass without celebration.  

They brought such kind and thoughtful gifts for him.  

And just look at the very first one I opened:

More than we could have imagined...

Don't you just love it when you know God is trying to tell you something?!  We've been blessed to experience this recently.  Last month my friend, Amber, texted me saying that she was praying Ephesians 3:20 for Elijah.  

Two days later as I was reading my Bible, I came across the verse again.  I've always loved this verse.  I absolutely love the idea that God is able to do more than we can even IMAGINE, more than we could even think to ask.  That amazes me.  The next day, the verse was mentioned in church.  I chuckled and told Sven that I thought God was trying to tell me something.  I began praying this verse as well - asking Him to do more than we could ask or imagine.  I was thinking (and hoping!) that this may answered by getting Elijah home at sonic speed. ;)

While we still pray that we can go get him as soon as possible, we are amazed at what God has already done and just had to share it with you. Elijah's birthday is estimated as August 19 (very fun since all of our other kids are also born on odd days of the month).  We sure do love to celebrate birthdays around here and the thought of my son celebrating his first birthday without his family kind of breaks my heart.  There are people in China whom you can hire to deliver cakes/gifts and take pictures of your child in the orphanage.  Unfortunately, our agency really discourages doing this.  I called them to see just how strongly they discourage it because I REALLY wanted to do this for him.  After getting off of the phone with the agency, I was discussing the situation with my friend, Jeni.  I mentioned that Harmony House (Elijah's foster home) seems so nice that I wondered if they would really mind.  She volunteered to send an email to Harmony Outreach (since we were told not to contact the foster home directly) to find out if it would be ok to send a birthday cake to a child (she kept it very vague).  She texted me soon after, saying, "You are going to be sooooo excited!"  She was right!

They knew who she was talking about w/o even mentioning his name or birthdate.  We are able to send money directly to them and they'll have a little party for him.  The director of the ministry is going to China at the end of the month and volunteered to take anything with him that I'd like to send.  They have gotten me in contact with people who know our little guy and have pictures from their recent visits to the home.  Rumor has it there is even a recent video of him just giggling and laughing.  That brings tears to my eyes just typing that.  I pray we can see that soon.  I cannot wait to see him in motion and hear his voice!!  It has been amazing to hear from people who know our little guy.  

And it gets better.  While we have spent months praying that our son would be in a place where he is safe, fed and even loved, these amazing people have prayed that this boy would be placed in a home where he will be loved and taught about Jesus.  How amazing that they were the answer to our prayers and we were the answer to theirs.  Only God.

One more thing: we were expecting that our little guy would need to have a couple of surgeries after we bring him home.  They mentioned that his heart condition should not require surgery and that they had paid to have his other surgeries done in December.  I was stunned.  I asked Sven to read the email and see if I was reading it correctly.  All of his surgeries were completed?!  We understand that anything can change, and more may be required later, but we are still so very grateful.  So, so grateful.  

Introducing.....

We were LID (log in date) to China on May 31. 

 I knew that we could get a referral anywhere from a little before that to months after that date.  

Let's just say that waiting does not come easily for me. ;)  

On June 21, I received a phone call from one of our agency reps, Sarah.  I had sent an email asking if she thought we may be matched off of the upcoming shared list.  As we spoke, Sarah explained that we probably wouldn't be matched off of that list because she had a file for us to look over right then.  She explained the age, needs and backstory of this little guy and said that she would send his file quickly.  I immediately called Sven and gave him the details.  He then waited for me to receive the file and forward it to him.  

When I received it, this is the first picture that I saw:

I'm pretty sure that my heart stopped for a moment...

We were really surprised by how much information we received about him.  The medical files were pretty detailed.  Sven looked them over, and spoke with three other docs about them in about half as hour.  I emailed Sarah and told her YES!!!  She replied that it was wonderful that we wanted him, but we should probably take some time to talk to a physician. She got a kick out of me saying that I'd already consulted 4 of them.  ;)

She submitted our LOI (letter of intent) to China on June 25th and we received PA (pre-approval) from China on July 5.  We also received an update from his foster home - Harmony House.  The update contained more recent photos of our not-so-little guy as well as information about his routine and personality.  This is one of the photos that we received:

 Elijah JianLong

(seriously.cannot.wait.to.squeeze.those.cheeks.)

At this point, the big question is "When will you go get him?". 

 Unfortunately, we don't have a super-clear answer on that one.  We are currently waiting on our LOA (letter of approval) from China.  They have prepped us to wait 3-4 months for LOA, but of course, we are praying for much sooner than that. We have heard of others getting theirs sooner, so we hope that will be the case for us.  After LOA, they estimate 10-12 weeks before travel.  

Every day our children (and we!) pray for God to bring Elijah home soon.  We are so thankful that he is in [what certainly appears to be] a wonderful foster home.  However, we also know that every child thrives best in a loving family.  It is difficult to think of missing milestones as well as the everyday smiles and sounds.  We want to be the ones hugging him, reading to him, playing with him, and singing him to sleep.  But for now, God has called us to wait.  So we pray that He gives us the strength to do so  in a way that honors Him while still praying that He does indeed bring Elijah home SOON.   

We are thankful for this:

Psalm 68:5-6a

A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows,
    is God in his holy dwelling.
⁶ God sets the lonely in families,